the battle between business and being a grace-filled writer

Well, dear readers,

The girl is back again. At least I am doing my best to stay consistent. I had promised a dear friend that I would have a post up by, if not Friday, then yesterday. I haven't kept my word on that, unfortunately, so I am making good on it today.

Well, before we get into the topic of my chosen title, let's get the updates out of the way.

I am now the published author of two stories. Before this blog was even thought about last winter, I had a small story published in Keys for Kids, a devotional booklet for children. Now, I've just had word that Brio magazine, a Christian magazine for teen girls, is going to publish another story of mine.

I can't link to the Keys for Kids story, I'm sorry to say, but when Brio publishes my story (most likely late next year), someone remind me to link that one up here.

Onto the next item of the agenda. I have another novel in the works. I can't let on what it is just yet. That's confidential information which needs to be kept under wraps between myself and my writing mentor for the moment.

Now we have had enough of the old business. Now onto the topic.

I have been in a battle with myself for quite a while now. I am pretty sure that whoever reads this post will agree once I say it, especially if you are a writer.

I have discovered since making my decision to write full time which I will save for another post, I must turn it into a business. A small one, but a business nonetheless.

I have researched and tried to gather as much info as I can. What I struggle with the most is having a regular routine and trying to begin a production schedule.

The pressure of it all has skyrocketed inside me and I find myself in a desperate struggle to either catch up to or race past whichever writer I currently admire, even my own dear writing mentor. I am tempted to toss aside my beliefs and compromise my own writing to try and please the market.

Yet, the faith-filled, Christian, and sensible side of me will have her say as well. She tells me to take my time, start out small, and remember to always be an example of Jesus Christ in whatever I do.

Now, for every Christian reading this, you know for a fact what this is. It is constant warfare between my spirit and my flesh. It is the constant battle between my own lust for glory and approval and fame against being a light shining for God and glorifying Him.

So what have I decided to do? I must admit, I don't know yet. I suppose listen to the sensible side and build up. Write for a half hour or twenty minutes or even ten until I can build myself back up to how I was when I wrote my first novel.

Stop trying to compare myself with others, although I've struggled with that for years.

Also, to try and be satisfied with the fact that I have been blessed to be given the massive amount of time I have to build up this business and the fact that, even though my paychecks are kind of small now, I am getting accepted. Any creative person in the arts whether artist, musician, or writer will tell you, rejection is cruel but real.

I suppose I am done ranting for the day. Don't worry. Something tells me when I make my goals for my new business, entertaining and informing you guys will be up there on the list and on a more consistent basis.

Keep me in your thoughts and prayers, readers. Only the Lord knows how much I need it.